The Secrets to Having More Self Confidence: Part 4

confidence Sep 07, 2021

Have you ever had that experience where you’re standing in the shower or making a sandwich, or putting laundry in the washing machine and all of a sudden, seemingly out of nowhere,  negative thoughts just wash over you.

“Who do you think you are?”

“You’ll never be a good enough mom.”

“How did you let your house get that messy?”

You’ve gotten so good at putting yourself down the yucky thoughts just show up out of the blue when you haven’t done anything wrong. 

I mean you’re taking a shower, for crying out loud!

I know there have been times in my life where this has happened to me. A lot.

I got so good at seeing what was wrong with me, I did it automatically. All. The. Time.

If you’ve been following my posts for the last few weeks, you know I’ve been focusing on what self confidence is and how to have more of it. 

This is the last post in that series (Here’s the intro. post if you missed it.), and today I want to focus on Brooke Castillo’s #3: Your opinion of yourself. 

Think about that for a minute.

What is your honest, unfiltered opinion of yourself?

Because your thoughts about you make or break your self confidence. 

How often do you think terrible thoughts about yourself? Your abilities? Your appearance?

How often do you think lovely thoughts about yourself? 

More often than not, I hear my clients tell me that they spend a lot of time thinking negatively about themselves.

Very rarely do they take time to be gentle and express love and compassion to themselves.

This is totally normal.

And human.

Our brains are wired to find problems, and they are so good at it.

The thing is we don’t need to look for lions and tigers and bears anymore. 

So our brain looks for the next best predator.

That usually turns out to be ourselves. 

Our brain will find everything wrong that we ever did, if we let it.

But the good news is, we don’t have to give it any of that control.

We can choose the thoughts we think.

So the next time you’re taking that shower and all your faults hit you like a ton of bricks, what if you thought:

“You are perfectly human.”

“Self, I love you no matter what.”

“I have my own back.”

“I’m kind, beautiful, and loveable just the way I am.” 

You are all those things, you know?


For reals.

Trust me.

You can change the world with perspective like that.

P.S. If you have it as your new year’s resolution to increase your confidence this year, message me to schedule a free coaching session. I promise you’ll leave with a customized plan to increase your confidence.

Originally Published 1/21/20

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